Internet killed the Vidya Star: Sonic the Hedgehog

...and the moment John put on his custom made Sonic fursuit, a billion Dad's across the world all cried out at once in disapproval..."YOU ARE NOT MY SON"

You all should be ashamed of yourself.  Why Sonic?  Why not humiliate a less memorable character like Alfred Chicken from that crap SNES game that nobody remembers?  Nope, the bowels of the Internet had to go and desecrate one of the most beloved characters from my childhood.  It's been a gradual thing it seems, over the years I've watched it get worse.  Before, I simply avoided doing searches for Sonic on Deviantart, but now, god help you if you type his name into a standard Google Image search.

Not that I'm constantly searching for pictures of the poor guy, but it's like that uncle who was really cool when you were a kid, then he moved away and you don't see him anymore.  Then you attempt to re-connect by finding his Facebook profile and notice it's filled with pictures of him and his boyfriend on vacation and you just can't stop looking at how tan he is....Yeah.

Oh Chris-Chan ^_^

It seem's I'll never understand the Internet's fascination with drawing one of my fond childhood memories in all manner of despicable acts.  I suspect this whole phenomenon of "Sonic the Hedgehog: WTF?!! MY EYES!!" has a much deeper, perhaps Freudian connection going on.  Trying to analyze(heh) furries and other miscreants though is a futile effort.  They're going to keep drawing bi-curious sonic and Tails "art".  They're going to keep churning out Sonic/Harry-Potter crossover erotic fan fictions and there's NOTHING you or I can do about it.  This the reason I literally haven't played a Sonic Game since like 1998, and I will continue avoiding them.

Yup

I Remember a time when Sonic was cool, he was like the counter-culture to the whole carebear, hand holding lame-parade that was Nintendo.  He had some edginess to him, that a fat plumber simply couldn't match. However, we destroyed him, we let furries, and weirdos take away our cool video game mascot, and in all likelihood drove  a great company out of the hardware business altogether.  On that note, I leave you with a video.  if only the sick, twisted internet dwellers would have simply listened to Sonic, he was sending you all a message!

Contra Speed Run: Epic

Well after having no Internet for like 4 days I return to bring you the most beastly Contra speed run (NES version) I have ever seen.  This guy isn't perfect and probably could have shaved about a minute off his time, but ZERO lives lost throughout, and his mastery of Snow Field and Energy Zone are insane.  Keep in mind before this though the game is pretty much easy-mode, but watching this is almost like artwork to me.  Contra isn't the hardest game to beat without losing a life, (I've done it a few times) but to do it this fast is pretty impressive.

Garfield Games: Why do you exist?

Thankfully, my parents have never "caught me in the act"...and why is he so happy about it?

How many of you as a kid were really into Garfield?  ok...How many of you were into Ninja Turtles, Pokemon, Batman, Power Rangers, Transformers, Disney Stuff, or even Barney?  That's what I thought.  Some characters manage to spawn a franchise title on just about every system, and the Garfield games that have come out over the years continue to baffle me.  Is there really a market for these games?  Do they really sell enough copies to warrant sequel after sequel on each generation of systems?  I know there's a niche market for certain games and characters, but I don't really see any hipsters telling me they were into Garfield before I was and I've probably never heard of him.  No, I've heard of him, and he's frankly, kind of stupid. 


I've put alot of thought into the mindset of software distributors and why they release these types of games(yes, I'm really that bored).  There's loads of articles out there if you're really curious as to why companies continually release what's known in the industry as "shovelware" it's profitable, but most agree it hurts the console or platform in the long run.  I kinda think shovelware is neat to collect, as it's different, quirky, and responsible for my favorite game of all time...

Haters gonna hate

I don't always play DS, but when I do I ride HorseZZZZZZ ya'll.

Another update, go check this out

Mr. Insanium is giving away some awesome nerdy stuff, like the #1 issue of Alien Vs. Predator, go check his blog out. 

http://crackinstuff.blogspot.com/

Also, if you want me to add your blog to my feed on the right side, leave it's address here, I get alot of traffic so it should help you out <3

Sequels, and why they suck: Snake's Revenge

 Back in action bro's!  Regular updates coming again after this date.  Looks like I am going to start making this blog thing a full time (second) job for me!

I'm a big fan of the Metal Gear series of games, and I love Metal Gear for the NES, and Playstation.  This however is a little known game released for the NES system in 1990.  What alot of people love about the Metal Gear games is designer Hideo Kojima's masterful game play, and storyline.  This However is not that game.  it was developed without his knowledge and oversight, thus resulting in a dumbed down version of the original.  What else can I say so here's a quote lifted directly from the man himself: "Snake's Revenge was a "little crap game."  When the guy responsible for the rest of the games in this amazingly successful franchise says this, you know it sucks.

Early example of "shovelware"

I need ideas for games to review so any suggestions in the comments please!